In the early morning hours of July 3rd MPRD officers responded to a desperate call for help at a house in the 3700 block of 34th Street. It seemed that, unnoticed by the residents, a wily possum had sneaked into their quiet place of abode and took up residence in the bathroom. They were none too happy about the situation and needed someone to remove the trespassing beast from their happy home. They were in luck - MRPD's fearless Possum Hunter was on the job!
No stranger to critter removal, MRPD's fearless Possum Hunter, a.k.a. PFC Tuk Carpenter, donned his possum huntin' gloves and went straight to work. He thoroughly evaluated the situation and, after making sure that the residents (the human residents) were safely out of the way, began his approach. He tactically stalked Mr. Possum and maneuvered himself into a position to strike. Like a crafty snake charmer the Possum Hunter distracted the marsupial with one hand; and, with one lightening-quick motion snatched the beast up by the tail with his free hand. The possum, being seriously perturbed that he had been had by a mere human, attempted to ferociously spray urine at the Possum Hunter in retaliation. The Possum Hunter, wise to the ways of opossum assault tactics, had already anticipated this move and deftly evaded the noxious attack. With his prize in hand, the victorious Possum Hunter removed the hapless beast from the residence and returned it to its proper home in the wilds of the Great City.